the face of the deep

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. (Genesis 1.1-2)

The trouble with a classicist he looks at a tree
That's all he sees, he paints a tree
The trouble with a classicist he looks at the sky
He doesn't ask why, he just paints a sky

The trouble with an impressionist, he looks at a log
And he doesn't know who he is, standing, staring, at this log
And surrealist memories are too amorphous and proud
While those downtown macho painters are just alcoholic
The trouble with impressionist is The trouble with impressionist is

The trouble with personalities, they're too wrapped up in style
It's too personal, they're in love with their own guile
They're like illegal aliens trying to make a buck
They're driving gypsy cabs but they're thinking like a truck
The trouble with personalities is
The trouble with personalities is

I like the druggy downtown kids who spray paint walls and trains
I like their lack of training, their primitive technique
I think sometimes it hurts you when you stay too long in school
I think sometimes it hurts you when you're afraid to be called a fool
The trouble with classicists is
The trouble with classicists is
(lou reed, from songs for drella- a fiction
which is a musical and lyrical tribute to andy warhol)

see, the main problem with comparing God to anything or anyone is that the 'likes' may be poignant and meaningful, but they are infinitely outnumbered by the 'unlikes.' it's a given that any comparison metaphor is going to fall way short...

we are trying to describe infinity in finite terms
we are trying to describe holiness in fallen terms
we are trying to describe perfection in fatally flawed terms
we are trying to describe transcendence in descendant terms
got it.

so to subject the character of God to the defaults that people often have towards something like abstract expressionism and troubled, dysfunctional and in all ways lost characters like the artist jackson pollock is problematic at best...

kurt vonnegut, in his inspiring book of neo-art-historical fiction Bluebeard describes a scene between an older, more established artist (compared earlier on in the book to a taxidermist who 'stuffed and mounted and varnished and mothproofed supposedly great moments, all of which turn out to be depressing dust-catchers, like a moosehead bought at a country auction or a sailfish on the wall of a dentist's waiting room') and an impressionable young padawan who wants to be a great artist someday...

After Dan Gregory at our first meeting ordered me to make a super-realistic painting of his studio, he said that there was a very important sentence he wanted me to learn by heart. This was it: "The Emperor has no clothes."

"Let me hear you say it," he said. "Say it several times."

So I did. "The Emperor has no clothers, the Emperor has no clothes, the Emperor has no clothes."

"That was a really fine performance, " he said, "really topping, really first rate." He clapped his hands appreciatively.

How was I supposed to respond to that? I felt like Alice in Wonderland.

"I want you to say that out loud and with just that degree of conviction," he said, "anytime anyone has anything good to say about so-called modern art."

"O.K." I said.

"It's the work of swindlers and lunatics and degenerates," he said, "and the fact that many people are now taking it seriously proves to me that the world has gone mad. I hope you agree."

"I do, I do," I said. It sounded right to me.

"Mussolini thinks so, too." he said.

(sorry, the link i copied and pasted here was broken by the blog template...
you'll just have to go out and buy the book like i did...)

still, when we look behind the mythologies of these stunningly original thinkers and the stereotypes arising from their difficulties with regular day to day relationships, circumstances and life, we are treated with a stunning metaphor that works on many levels... even many of the insults and accusations match...

i was reminded of God recently while watching one of my favourite biopics: Pollock.

there is a scene which is almost hypnotic, in which the painter gazes upon the canvas, deciding how to best place the essence of who he is; an image- his image- upon the canvas in a way that articulates who he is, not just his ability to create. viewing this film, i was challenged to consider to just what degree the comparisons can be faithfully made between the creation, intentions and involvement of God in life and the approach taken by the one particularly misanthropic artist.

(we just need to remember the earlier bit about the unlikes greatly outnumbering the likes, lest we default to a misanthropic God... although many of the insults and accusations hurled at God also match, i believe that they are more indicative of humankind's misanthropy, not God's. this is probably a tangent for a whole nother blog...)

in Possibilities I, published in New York, Winter 1947-8, jackson pollock describes his process:

My painting does not come from the easel. I hardly ever stretch my canvas before painting. I prefer to tack the unstretched canvas to the hard wall or floor. I need the resistance of a hard surface. On the floor I am more at ease. I feel nearer, more a part of the painting, since this way I can walk round it, work from the four sides and literally be in the painting.

It is only when I lose contact with the painting that the result is a mess. Otherwise there is pure harmony, an easy give and take, and the painting comes out well.

Narration Spoken by Jackson Pollock in the above posted Film by Hans Namuth and Paul Falkenberg 1951:
The method of painting is a natural growth out of a need. I want to express my feelings rather than illustrate them. Technique is just a means of arriving at a statement.

Sometimes I lose a painting. But I have no fear of changes, of destroying the image, because a painting has a life of its own. I kind of let it live.

(http://www.adherents.com/people/pp/Jackson_Pollock.html)

***

interesting that an adbar on the website from which i pulled the transcripted monologues above is inviting website visitors to purchase a 'how to paint oil' dvd on which a 'top world realist' teaches a 'simple method ANYONE can learn. i wonder if the realist's name is dan gregory...

see, my experience with art lessons was less than inspiring. however, my experience with worship lessons changed my life.

Q: What kind of teacher is God?
Q: How does God best express what God desires to express through us?
Q: How does God ready us for this expression?

i remember sitting in a seminar where the writer of many rich and meaningful songs had agreed to try to unpack his process for the would-be worship song writers in the room. before he went into his own songwriting preferences and processes, he was very careful to remind everyone in attendance that writing worship songs or otherwise reflecting the face of God aesthetically, bearing the image of God through art must needs begin with spending time with this God, reading, praying, practicing, journaling...

through an interesting string of miracles and redeemed accidents, i had found myself, over the year prior to this session, in a small subterranean room with a notebook, a bible and a guitar. Jesus' approach to teaching method had to do with placing opportunity before me and then inviting me to engage, to explore, to extrapolate. for me, there was no method apart from opportunity and invitation. the songwriter's words certainly affirmed this, as does the teaching in psalm 25.

perhaps our problem is that we are struggling so hard with how to be the artist that we have lost sight of what it means to be the art?

in 1 Thessalonians 5.17-18, we read ceaseless prayer.

keith green wrote an old song based on this verse called Make My Life a Prayer To You.

jim brooks, abstract expressionist colleague and friend of jackson pollack, painting around the same time said:

I lay on the first stroke of colour.
After that, the canvas has to do at least half the work!

john michael talbot, the singing, songwriting, secular franciscan monk who modeled worship and intimacy with God for me in his body of work that i have come to deeply love over the last quarter century or so put it this way...

An empty canvas waits before the Painter
It waits to be the painting it must be
Unto this end it’s rightfully been created
To reflect the rightful beauty the painter sees
A beauty that will surely find its life within its dying
So another might be born again
And in this constant death a constant beauty created
Within a constant love that never ends

Jesus is the Master Painter
The Holy Spirit is the Master’s brush
To be dipped within the colours that portray a father’s love
That the Master’s painting might be born of us
To portray the beauty of the Master’s brush
That the canvas of our life might know the Master’s touch

An empty canvas waits before the Painter
An empty canvas destined to be hung
Within the gallery once it has been created
Will the canvas bear the beauty of God’s Son?
(Talbot, 1980)

***

Life is to be an art work…
a thing of truth
and also a thing of beauty
in a lost and despairing world.
(Francis Schaeffer)

you go your way and i'll go mine?

we were talking about worship, and i was drawn to something i wrote long ago as i tried to articulate these things that were so out of my depth
(i know i've posted this online before- here we go again)...

worship isn't a designated time or place

it isn't a calculated emotional curve or a mosaic or isolated holy moments
no, although these can all be part of worship, it a gestalt of all of them for the earnest servant of God... it is a day by day, hour by hour, breath by breath, heartbeat by heartbeat song to God. it begins at the foot of the cross, through the moment of acceptance and straight on until morning. it is both active and passive and therefore all consuming. it is the reason that all creation exists- to reflect back the glory and the love of almighty God.

worship is saying 'you are' to I AM

one of the things that we take from the scriptures is that
worship is sacrifice… but what is sacrifice?

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source - Share This
sac·ri·fice /ˈsækrəˌfaɪs/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[sak-ruh-fahys] noun, verb, -ficed, -fic·ing. –noun

1.	the offering of animal, plant, or human life or of some material possession to a deity, as in propitiation or homage.

2.	the person, animal, or thing so offered.

3.	the surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable for the sake of something considered as having a higher or more pressing claim.

4.	the thing so surrendered or devoted.

Oh God said to Abraham, "Kill me a son"
Abe says, "Man, you must be puttin' me on"
God say, "No." Abe say, "What?"
God say, "You can do what you want Abe, but
The next time you see me comin' you better run"
Well Abe says, "Where do you want this killin' done?"
God says, "Out on Highway 61."
(bob dylan, Highway 61 Revisited, 1965)

Highway 61, the main thoroughfare of the country blues, begins about where I came from… Duluth to be exact. I always felt like I’d started on it, always had been on it and could go anywhere from it, even down into the deep Delta country. It was the same road, full of the same contradictions, the same one-horse towns, the same spiritual ancestors. (bob dylan, Chronicles Volume 1, 2005)

in Genesis 22, God commands Abraham to sacrifice his certainty, his hope and his future out on the road that begins at WHO YOU WERE and travels to WHO YOU WILL BECOME…it is a story of origin, journey and revelation.

that dylan chooses to explore this biblical story in what some have called his most perfect song, is interesting. at the heart of this song and, indeed this biblical story, is an acknowledgement of how we are often called by God to release the things of which we are most sure, and to do so as an act of worship. paul's letter to the romans, chapter 4.1-3 speaks lovingly of abraham's life, sacrifices and faith, reminding the readers that these were 'counted to him as righteousness.'

further on in romans 12.1-2, we are challenged to present ourselves as living sacrifices. it appears as though faith and opportunity meet out on highway 61- the main thoroughfair of our lives, the place where everything on the journey happens- and the decisions we make at this crossroads are crucial to our moving forward, even when this particular usage of the word 'forward' is a foreign one.

Highway 61 Revisited, with Dylan squeezing a police-car siren in what is probably his most perfectly written song, is sung as the ultimate tall tale. You find out that not only can anything happen on Highway 61… it already has… carrying runaway slaves north before the long highway had a single name and, not so much more than a century later, carrying Freedom Riders south.
(Greil Marcus, Like A Rolling Stone- Bob Dylan at the Crossroads, 2005)

see, the road from any here to any there only becomes meaningful when we choose to engage with it… when we redeem it from being simply a means of traveling from one place to another to being a place in and of itself… by becoming intimately involved in the journey itself, we come to recognize the grace and the wisdom afforded us by every step, every sign-post, every rest stop…

in canada, hitch-hiking the No1 is much different than driving it, which is much different than sleeping it away in the backseat, and much different than flying over it. The slower the mode of travel, the greater the opportunity to grow intimately acquainted with the road itself and to gather fruit from the journey…

I find when I'm always going, or thinking about going,
or trying to go I have a tendency to miss things.
(hineini)

as i thought more deeply about the implications of abraham's story, i was reminded of my friend, who blogs under the name hineini, and some of the things that he has shared about this, one of his favourite passages of scripture in the whole bible. rather than presume that i was afforded some higher vantage point, being the preacher in the room, i invited my friend to reflect upon where these scriptures take him- especially when it comes to embracing this notion of sacrifice.

Genesis 22, or the story of the binding of Isaac, has always been one of the biblical passages that has spoken most strongly to me and what its said to me has changed as I have grown older and most recently, now that I have a son of my own. Most of us have heard it so often it has become, like many of the stories we find in the bible, familiar to us, but it is a terrible story, a story that makes me tremble, a story about the costs, the incredibly high costs, of love.

The story begins with God calling to Abraham and Abraham answers “Here I am” This is the same “Here I am” of Moses, of Samuel, of Isaiah, and of others. It is a greeting but it also means “I will” or “I stand at the ready”. God goes on to request of Abraham saying, “Take your son, your only son, the son whom you love, Isaac”. Its as if we are hearing only one side of the conversation. God says take your son and Abraham replies I have two sons Ishmael and Isaac. God says take your only son to which Abraham replays but Ishmael is my only son with Hagar and Isaac is my only son with Sarah. God says take the son whom you love most and Abraham replies I love my sons equally. And so God chooses for Abraham...”Take Isaac”. Take Isaac and offer him as a burnt sacrifice. Its a frightening request, its horrible, unimaginable. But we know Abraham's response, we know what Abraham's great faith leads him to do. He agrees. He gathers a few things, splits some wood for the sacrifice and with two servants and his son Isaac, heads out to an unknown place, a place that God will show him. It must have been a long trip. Much longer than the two days it took to travel. I can't imagine what he must have been thinking, God's request echoing through his head with each step.

God shows him the place for the sacrifice and Abraham leaves his servants, loads up the wood for the sacrifice on Isaac and together they climb. It must have been a quiet climb. At one point Isaac asks his father. Dad, we have everything we need for a sacrifice except the animal, where is it?

What can Abraham possibly say? Surely he wants to answer his son, and he does. But yet he can't answer his son, not with out terrifying him, maybe causing him to flee. Abraham says only “God will see to God's sheep for the sacrifice” or in another translation, “God will provide”. Something we may say fairly often, daily even.

The story continues, Abraham and Isaac arrive at the place, Abraham builds the alter and lays out the wood and then his eyes move to his son. Was there a struggle? Did the boy try and get away? We don't know but I cannot even imagine that scene as I look at my son. The text says that Abraham bound his son and laid him on the altar on top of the wood and drew back the knife to slaughter his son. What was he thinking? How could he? But yet Abraham knew that there can be no holding back when God makes a request. That even our most cherished, those things we love the most, can not be held in reserve and that at any moment God might ask of us, out of love for God, to sacrifice what we love.

To me this begs the question “what about now?” What if my friend comes to me relating a similar demand placed on them by God. What if they tell me they think God is telling them to sacrifice something precious to them, maybe some of us have heard this before, its not unheard of. But what if they were to come and tell me “God is asking that I sacrifice my son, or my daughter”. Surely I would intervene, I would have too. I would try to help them, or stop them or both. Love demands it. Maybe that’s why Sarah isn't told, why she is kept out of the loop. Its too terrible to tell her, the mother of the sacrifice. Surely she would have forbid it, fought tooth and nail in the name of love to save her son. Who wouldn't? Maybe that’s why Abraham remains in Beer-Sheba after the ordeal while at the beginning of Genesis 23 we are informed of Sarah's death not in Beer-Sheba but in Hebron. Maybe it was too much to bear, her husband sacrificing her only son. The stakes are so high.

So too with Isaac. The text tells us in verse 6 that after leaving the servants “the two walked off together”. Abraham and Isaac climbed to the site of the sacrifice but in verse 19, after God stops the sacrifice, stops Abraham from slaying his son, Abraham is the only one mentioned who descends to rejoin the servants. Isaac isn't mentioned. Did Isaac return with his father? Could he have? We don't know, the text doesn't tell us, in fact we never see father and son together again in the text. Maybe this is the cost of love. The stakes could not get any higher. It cost Abraham his son and his wife.

I'll be the first to say I'm not up to the task. The demands of love are hard enough as it is when it demands my time and my attention, but my son? I don't think I could, and that’s what scares me. Knowing that at any moment God may arrive, demanding of me, for loves sake, that I sacrifice what I love. It makes me wish there were rules, or limits, someway to say “God would never ask this of me” “I can keep this certain something to myself.” But the story of Abraham reveals this isn't the case. Of all the things Abraham should have been able to keep for himself his son should have been it, a gift given to him by God. Of all the things which should have no part in Love surely murder is one. But even this is asked of him. The stakes are high, the highest, love is life and death.

In verse 14 Abraham names the place of the sacrifice. He calls it Adonai-yirch, or “The Lord will see”. God will see what our response is to the demands of love, to the demands of those around us who are in need and from which we can hold nothing back if we want to truly love. How can God not see? If, as the text tells us in 1 John that God is love then how can not see each and every demand of love placed on us. But God is not only the one demanding as in the story of Abraham and Isaac and not only the demand itself as love but is also the recipient of love for Jesus tells us in Matthew that whatever we do for the least of those around us, whatever we do for those who confront us and demand we love them by their very presence with us, whatever we do for each and every person we encounter we are doing it to or for or with God. And we can call each and every one “Adonai-yirch”, God will see. (hineini)

so what do we do with this?

what do we do if God steps into the story and asserts that it is God’s desire that we place the one thing that matters most to us- our certainty, or grip on the way things are supposed to work out, our picture of progress, our sense of stability and order- upon the stone table of sacrifice?

what songs shall we sing together then?

our original self is created to bring honour and glory to God through our involvement in and realization of God’s dream for us all together:

“That they would be my people and I would be their God…”

the realization of this dream involves
daily worship, daily sacrifice... are we up to it?

atlantic crossing

recently at a silent auction for my son's school band, i bought a lump of coal.

not just any coal, mind you- this was actual r.m.s. titanic coal (bearing its own numbered certificate of authenticity and everything) that had been collected from the bottom of the atlantic ocean by entrepreneurial excavation crews. i bid against another pastor and eventually won the auction- which, of course, meant that i was no obligated to buy the item... sure showed him!

however, like with most things, this led to that which led to something else and i found myself pondering an image in my heart: all those people, floating in the cold…

romans 7.14-25 speaks of the writer's exasperation with being a sinful man. he has already acknowledged back in romans 3.23 that 'all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God' but what seems to really be getting his goat is the fact that he feels powerless to break his habitual 'falling short'...

no matter how hard he tries
no matter how strong his resolve
he cannot save himself.

if it were an email, he would probably hit the caps lock button before typing verse twenty four, where his frustration with himself comes to an explosive climax:

WHO WILL RESCUE ME FROM THIS BODY OF DEATH?

who indeed?

all those people floating in the cold...

speaking of atlantic crossings, emma lazarus wrote an invitation that has been immortalized by its placement upon the statue of liberty, but which could be very appropriately placed upon any church sign:

Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!

this seems to paraphrase Jesus' words in matthew 11.28-30 about the weak and the tired finding rest. the problem is that, were we to place either the poem or Christ's words on the church sign, the question that would still hang in the air for me is who would come in response to this?

or perhaps, more cynically:
what right have we earned to invite?

rick mckinley, the tattooed pastor of imago dei in portland oregon, said recently to someone from leadership journal that

Our goal is not to create a community of volunteers; the goal is to glorify the king by doing what he’s called us to do. We’re in a story that’s been going on for thousands of years… The story of Jesus putting the world back together through the gospel.

all those people floating in the cold, with a small, fortunate few sitting in lifeboats; fear over what will happen if the lifeboats go back and try to rescue those in the water; dismay of some over the self-centred reticence of the rest in the sparsely filled boats to go back and rescue the perishing; frustration of those in one boat going back with how many have been lost because the rescue took too long to organize, with help and hope coming too late to all those people floating in the cold...

(note: this youtube clip was the best i could find... however, it has been hacked a little and misses some important dialogue between molly brown and the people in her lifeboat regarding social responsibility and fear. it also has, for some reason, been edited to no longer contain the lifeboat leader's key line of regret: "we waited too long". just rent or buy the movie and watch it- the clip serves as a loose reference only! ha ha.)

perhaps this is what Jesus meant when he said
the harvest is plentiful but the workers are few...
(matthew 9.37)

in any event, i don't think i'll ever be able to watch the final moments of titanic without feeling a sense of urgent responsibility for all those people floating in the cold.

corrective lenses

we bring a lot with us to our reading of scripture.
people read…

through their tradition,
through their upbringing,
through their perspective,
through every sunday school class they did or didn't attend,
through every well-intentioned but doctrinally disjunct bible study,
through every talk that put them to sleep before the final point,
through every song they've heard that had biblical content..

everything.

reading the bible is a lot like trying to interpret a work of art.

it requires study, preparation and informance because we can't get away from the fact that we have perceptual screens which colour or otherwise distort everything. it's probably prudent to both acknowledge them and, where they distort truth, apply more perspective- like corrective lenses.

two lenses are particularly useful in this regard:

experience. nothing comes close to equipping us for drawing meaning from a piece of art or a piece of scripture like experience with the genre in question. the more experience we have with it, the more familiar we are with the languages used and therefore the more capable we are to perceive the deeper themes, to discover the rich poetry that lays beneath the surface of our earliest impressions.

relationship. being surrounded by fellow students affords us both balance and perspective, enriching and informing the conclusions that we draw through ongoing dialogue with these others as we wrestle the angel in search of meaning and blessing.

the goal, after all, is to earnestly discover the word behind the words...

distance and direction

Revive us with your fire
-Robin Mark

when we sing this song, what are we asking God to do?
what does this word Revival mean?

· an awakening?

· a raising from the dead?

in 2002, recognizing that this moment of clarity would soon pass, i frantically scribbled a vision down in my journal while it could be contained in words:

I dream of a time when Revival of historical proportions lights this city on fire for months on end; a time when people are phoning us from all around the country asking what God is doing here because they have heard it on The National; a time when the only thing that matters will be that God's name is lifted up and his people are found faithful in serving him through truly loving those whom he loves and whom he died to save.

As God lights the fires of Revival in this city, I long to see him use our church... that we might not be boxed into these four walls, but that we would be part of God's larger work in this city and this world.

That we might be part of the day of the Lord.

yes yes, very nice

but what about the mass-murderers and the drug-dealers and the pornographers and the baby-killers and the war-mongers and those who misuse power to exploit others to some degree to their own ends... does this day of the Lord hold any hope for them?

1 corinthians 6.9-10 seems to be pretty clear that there are no easy spots to be flippantly had. we're all in the same soup and any winking at sin cheapens the shed blood of Christ. the writer of 1 corinthians is pretty frank in 6.11 when he speaks of being washed, sanctified and justified in Jesus' name by the Spirit of God.

and what about that frowning woman in the honking car with LOVE stamped on her license plate? does the 'day of the Lord' and all of this grace from God even include her?

i think i have more immediate grace for manson family member susan atkins (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Susan_Atkins) than i have for someone who is simply rude to me.

it is humbling, considering how rude i myself can be.

yet Jesus made it abundantly clear when he spoke to his boys in john 14.1-7 that he was modeling, for us all, the extent to which we are to offer grace to another.

to one who has transgressed,
am i ready to offer unconditional forgivenness?
to one who is needy,
am i ready to offer food, clothing, shelter and fellowship?
to one destined for an eternal separation from God,
am i willing to offer my life in order to share the truth?
am i willing even to put my own forever in jeopardy
for another?
hmmm...

in his book, the brothers karamazov, fyoder dostoevsky tells a story of a woman who did one good thing for another in her entire life:

Once upon a time there was a peasant woman and a very wicked woman she was. And she died and did not leave a single good deed behind. The devils caught her and plunged her into the lake of fire.

So her guardian angel stood and wondered what good deed of hers he could remember to tell to God; ‘She once pulled up an onion in her garden,’ said he, ‘and gave it to a beggar woman.’

And God answered: ‘You take that onion then, hold it out to her in the lake, and let her take hold and be pulled out. And if you can pull her out of the lake, let her come to Paradise, but if the onion breaks, then the woman must stay where she is.’

The angel ran to the woman and held out the onion to her. ‘Come,’ said he, ‘catch hold and I’ll pull you out.’ he began cautiously pulling her out. He had just pulled her right out, when the other sinners in the lake, seeing how she was being drawn out, began catching hold of her so as to be pulled out with her.

But she was a very wicked woman and she began kicking them. ‘I’m to be pulled out, not you. It’s my onion, not yours.’ As soon as she said that, the onion broke. And the woman fell into the lake and she is burning there to this day. So the angel wept and went away. (dostoevsky)

in his book, Son of a Preacher Man, jay bakker (son of television evangelist, jim) urges the church to get over itself...

We should abandon the unimportant trappings of religion in order to meet real people where they really are. (Bakker)

interesting that the things that we hold dear, the things that give our faith experience some structure, are often referred to as 'trappings' (something that somehow ties us up from living a life of freedom.)

meeting real people where they really are may mean that we need to not only go out of our way to find them, but even further- living there with them, serving them, forgiving them, offering them the kind of fellowship that we would offer the king of kings if he were to grace us with a visit.

if not able to even imagine this, then how truly far are we from this kingdom- this realization of God’s glory and purpose for all humankind?

what if the coming of the day of the Lord relies more on our faithful response to the needs of the other than we realize?

***

Distance and direction, resistance and dissection
Assistance and perfection, insistence and inspection
Two of me, two of you, two of us, two by two
The double life we live
Distance and direction run straight ahead
To your better world (to your better world)

We're putting on our make-up. but we never make-up
We're the beauty and the beast, we're dead men telling tales
Sleeping through our wake-up
Two of me, two of you, two of us, two by two
The double life we live
Distance and direction run straight ahead
To your better world
(Terry Taylor, circa 1982)

the truth within the hyperbole

in my quest for the best pop-video clip to illustrate a point i wanted to make about the way people interact spacially with each other, i stumbled upon pure gold... the close talker bit from seinfeld's the raincoats (episode 5.18)

George then tells them that Frank and Estelle (who is making paella) want them over for dinner before they leave, but they claim they have plans for the night. Jerry is frustrated that they have lied about having plans because now his parents will be home and he can’t have Rachel over. Elaine brings her new boyfriend up to the apartment, Aaron, played by Judge Reinhold, who is a close talker (a person who stands unusually close to others when speaking ... in essence disrupting the person's personal space), he then takes out Jerry’s parents to a behind the scenes tour of the Metropolitan Museum of Art, which Jerry and Elaine find quite weird...

( thanks to the good people at wikipedia for the synopsis... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Raincoats,_Part_1)

sitcoms are great for providing us with examples of human behaviour which are familiar enough to us that we recognize the truth within the hyperbole.

aaron, the close talker breaks all the rules of personal and social space, but somehow manages to 'connect' naturally with jerry's parents (who, by the way, do not connect well with george's parents, even though they've known each other since the baby boom fuse was lit). although representative samples of entirely different demographic populations (certainly racial, generational, educational etc) aaron and jerry's parents just 'hit it off'... a great example of how we are just created to belong with others.

now deciding what to do with these natural affinities is an important part of finding our place in this world that is so full of people.

People are strange, when you're a stranger
Faces look ugly when you're alone
Women seem wicked, when you're unwanted
Streets are uneven, when you're down

When you're strange- faces come out of the rain
When you're strange- no one remembers your name
When you're strange. (Jim Morrison)

Jesus demonstrates, in his life and ministries that there might be some truth to edward t. hall's theory of proxemics (as cited in joseph myers' book The Search to Belong) if we are endeavouring to be ‘Christian’ or ‘Christ-like’ then perhaps we can learn something here about how to manage our people spaces- and the relationships entrusted to us within them- to reflect the warmth, grace and love of God in a natural, rather than well-intentioned but nonetheless artificial way. consider a couple gospel examples of each proxemic zone...

• Public Jesus: (Matt 8.5-13, 16-17) Centurion; Masses requiring healing and release
  
• Social Jesus: (John 2.1-10; Luke 5.27-32) Wine at the Wedding; Dinner with Levi
  
• Personal Jesus: (Matt 8.14-15; John 13-17) Peter’s Mother In-Law; The Last Supper
  
• Intimate Jesus: (John 13.21-26; Matt 16.15-23) 'Jesus loved’; Jesus named…

within the life of Christ, as well as within our own lives, space and grace seem to be in relationship: you get the sense that not just anybody could call peter 'satan' without getting punched, but Jesus could.

see, we all have these unwritten, unspoken rules which govern our relationships. they have to do with the way we were raised, our personal experience with people and our personality… and yet somehow amidst all this chaotic, interpersonal disorder, we can see and hopefully learn from some predictable relational patterns... it is impossible to give the same amount of yourself to everyone, and likewise it is impossible to extend the same amount of grace to everyone…

the challenge is to mutually understand and value the relationship we share with another, not to demean this relationship by applying pressure to move into another space before its time- to allow our natural affinity to draw us into deeper relationship with some, while remaining comfortably casual with others.

In all four spaces, community emerges. And in all four spaces, people hope to connect spontaneously. Anything else feels contrived and out of place. (Myers)

the challenge, i suppose, is to sort out how we can be ever grace-giving, ever loving, ever God-honouring in whatever our relational proxemic is with another person.

poetry and price?

recently, i've begun to receive emails from www.poetry.com again.

about five years ago, i submitted a poem (ridiculously altered and edited almost beyond recognition in order to fit within the narrow parameters of acceptability) to see what would happen next. after electing to not buy any of the $60 anthologies of wannabe poets' tripe that were, i thought, poetry.com's only scam, the dead poets society stopped sending me correspondence.

that is, until i saw a note on facebook
and decided to submit another piece.

the flow of emails since confirming that i had not, in fact, died or whatever has been astonishing. apparently, the cast and crew of poetry.com absolutely love that first poem... they just keep going on and on about it:

Dear Darryl,

The votes are in, and we are proud to congratulate you for your outstanding literary achievement. The editors of The International Library of Poetry were thrilled to inform you that your poem was honored with the prestigious Editor’s Choice Award because of your artistic accomplishments and unique perspective--characteristics found in the most noteworthy poetic works. To further commemorate this prestigious achievement, we have elected you to receive the 2007 Editor’s Published Poet Ribbon Award Pin.

This stunning pin proudly displays your elevated status in our poetic community. Since only an elite group of published poets were selected to receive this special honor, imagine the sense of pride you will feel when others see you wearing the 2007 Editor’s Choice Published Poet Award Pin. What an impressive way to show off your status as an honored poet for the year 2007!

The elegant detail and the meticulous craftsmanship that went into the design and production of this exclusive pin are unprecedented. This striking jewelry piece has the International Library of Poetry name prominently displayed across the top, the Editor’s Choice commendation appears on the ribbon, and the entire pin is set in bronze. It is truly a masterpiece that honors your outstanding and well-deserved accomplishments, and it is a must-have for all esteemed poets.

To take advantage of this special offer to commemorate your exceptional poetic talents, simply go here. This exclusive pin is only $19.95, plus shipping & handling. If you wish to send us your order by mail, please include a copy of this email and your completed order form to receive this special offer.

An Added Bonus For A Limited Time Only!!!

We have commissioned artisans to create a Commemorative Bronze Medallion to celebrate the accomplishments of the Editor’s Choice winners. This beautiful two-sided medallion displays the words “Poet Scholar” and “Editor’s Choice” deeply etched into the medal. The medallion is packaged in a custom gift box with a certificate of authenticity to further enhance its prestige. You can receive this amazing keepsake for only $49.95, plus shipping and handling. For a limited time, when you take advantage of this unique offer of the bronze medallion, you will also receive the Editor’s Choice Published Poet Ribbon Award Pin at no additional charge. That’s right, the Editor’s Choice Published Poet Ribbon Award Pin will be yours FREE when you request the commemorative bronze medallion.

New for 2007!

Darryl, because you are receiving such high honors as a published poet, for the first time ever we want to reward you with the 2007 Editor’s Choice Commemorative Silver Watch. As a published poet, imagine the compliments, praise, and prestige you will receive from your family, friends, and peers when they admire and envy your watch as an iconic symbol of your success and talent. These limited edition unisex watches are available only to a group of elite and talented published poets like yourself, hand-picked by our editors.

The watch features a sophisticated rectangular face with a silver finish highlighted by the esteemed “Editor’s Choice” insignia on the black dial. Your watch will be accented with an imported adjustable black leather band. The watch comes in a stylish gift box for safekeeping when not proudly displayed on your wrist, or it can be used to display the embodiment of your outstanding literary achievements on your mantle.

Because your creativity and artistic abilities shine through in all your poetic works, you can receive this fashionable and prestigious accessory to celebrate your 2007 Editor’s Choice Achievement for only $119.00, plus shipping and handling. For a limited time only, when you take advantage of this unique offer of the 2007 Editor’s Choice Commemorative Silver Watch, you will also receive the Bronze Medallion and the 2007 Editor’s Choice Published Poet Ribbon Award Pin at no additional charge. The total package value of almost $200 will be yours for only $119.00 when you request the 2007 Editor’s Choice Commemorative Silver Watch.

As you are bestowing gifts to your friends and family during this holiday season, why not give yourself the gift of recognition for a job well done with your poetic achievements?

Darryl, we were delighted to award you the high honors of a published poet, and we hope that you will choose to receive the 2007 Editor’s Choice Commemorative Silver Watch, Bronze Medallion, and the 2007 Editor’s Choice Published Poet Ribbon Award Pin. We truly believe these masterpieces honor the artistic accomplishments you have displayed in your poetry.

Please accept my best wishes to you and your family during the holiday season.

Sincerely,

Howard Ely
Managing Editor
The International Library of Poetry / Poetry.com

---

P.S. We are confident that you will enjoy the classic design of the 2007 Editor’s Choice Commemorative Silver Watch, Bronze Medallion, and the 2007 Editor’s Choice Published Poet Ribbon Award Pin. The highest manufacturing standards have gone into the production of these items. And, best of all, they come with a 100% money-back guarantee. If you are not delighted with your items, simply return them to us within 90 days and your money will be promptly refunded.



within the same week, this one came:

hereby nominate Darryl Dozlaw

Please R.S.V.P.

After reading and discussing your poetry, the Board of Directors and the Advisory Committee of the International Society of Poets are pleased to announce your nomination as a Distinguished Member of our Society.

The International Society of Poets is the largest and most active poetry society in the world, with members in over 70 countries. Our objective is to appropriately recognize and award the poetic talents of our members
by providing a vital forum where poets can showcase their
poetry, encourage and support the achievements of fellow poets,
and share their love for the art of fine poetry.

Find out more about your nomination as a Distinguished Member of the International Society of Poets.

so i clicked on 'become a member now' (you can too) and found, waiting for me, the price of distinction...

so the price of belonging, for two years, complete with all the stuff which allows me to be outwardly identifiable as one who belongs (the watch, the box of medallions and the little pin) is $382 plus shipping and handling.

or i could just share my life, in relationship, with others for free...

well, not for free.

we all know that relationship costs us. it costs us love, grace, acceptance, time, energy, patience... all the things that our relationship with a Holy God cost Christ daily.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5.8)

***

by the way, if you go to this link and cast your vote, i can win a free ipod. if i do, i'll take you out for coffee!
heck, call me up and i'll take you out for coffee anyway!

http://www.poetry.com/voteforme/poemvote1.asp?PID=8290140

this all reminds me of a great bit from douglas adams'
hitch hiker's guide to the galaxy...

PROSTETNIC VOGON JELTZ
Now, Earthlings, I present you with a simple choice. Either die in the vaccum of space, or tell me...how good my poem was!

FORD looks weak and hopeless. PROSTETNIC VOGON JELTZ walks around behind a desk, and sits in a large chair, looking perfectly grumpy. He starts to smile again. Before VOGON JELTZ can finish, though, ARTHUR's eyes pop open.

ARTHUR
Actually, I quite liked it.

FORD's eyes widen and he turns to look at ARTHUR in confusion.

PROSTETNIC VOGON JELTZ
Oh, good...

ARTHUR
Oh, yes. I thought some of the metaphysical imagery was really particularly effective.

FORD stares some more, his mouth moving a little now.

PROSTETNIC VOGON JELTZ
Yes, do continue...

ARTHUR
Oh, and er, interesting rhythmic devices too...which seemed to...counterpoint the...uh...er...

FORD
...counterpoint the surrealism of the underlying metaphor of the...ah...

ARTHUR
...humanity of the...

FORD
Vogonity.

ARTHUR
Ah, yes, Vogonity, sorry, of the poet's compassionate soul, which contrives through the medium of the verse structure to subliminate this, transcend that, and come to terms with the fundamental dichotomies of the other, and one is left with a profound and vivid insight into...into...uh...

FORD
..whatever the poem was about.

sorry.. don't remember where i found this online. google 'Hitch hiker's Guide to the Galaxy' or 'Vogon poetry' or something like that and see where you end up. don't forget your towel.

science God

Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins a movie by telling you how it ends. Well I say there are some things we don’t want to know… Important things! (Ned Flanders)

i'm really tired of people drawing either/or lines in the sand when there should be meaningful crossover between science and faith. they are complementary disciplines. recently, in response to the silly simpsons quote above, a friend of mine said:

I find it curious that in this faith/science distinction faith is always accused of walking around blind to the realities of science yet science always seems to escape being criticised for walking around blind to the realities of faith. (hineini)

science is observational, theoretical and, above all, subject to time and further discovery. God is not subject… God IS the subject.

but without science, our study of God can become ‘incredible’, disembodied, mystical and esoteric. science needs to be simply another lens through which we see the love of God- indeed perhaps the very face of God.

for example, what if physics is only completely physical because we’ve relegated it to the physical box? what if part of the connection between all events, although perhaps not immediately perceptible as such, is that they are shadows, approximations or perhaps even enactments of that which is taking place in the spiritual realm and is, at the very least as real as this physical veneer…

what if the physical and spiritual were rent apart simply by our own spiritual disregard? what if science and faith actually belong together?

Q: what is the first sound recorded in the bible?
A: the voice of God: “Let there be light”

on the first page of our bibles, God and light seem to be together at the source of everything. on the last page of our bibles it’s the same. (genesis 1.3-4; revelation 21.22-23)

what if some scientific study of sound and light were to somehow inform our picture of our eternal God?

• isaac newton first used a prism to intentionally break white light into a spectrum, revealing that all was not as it seemed and paving the way for deconstructive studies like molecular biology and ultimately the splitting of the atom.

• taking the spectrum into account, divisionist painter georges seurat applied the properties of light to his approach to painting, essentially creating the possibility of the colour t.v. out of thin air and grandfathering pixelization, mused in his journals that …

“In nature, light is the source of reality.” (seurat)

• at the same time, albert einstein was developing theories of his own…

“Light is a particle that has mass and a volume of energy. energy (E) equals a constant number (h) times the frequency of the light (v) E=hv

In reality, all matter is nothing but condensed light.” (Einstein)

• in gary zukav’s book The Dancing Wu Li Masters the following observation is made in response to an experiment exploring the unexplainable connectedness of spinning particles…

"Sound waves only travel so fast… the fastest communication signal is the electromagnetic wave- like a light wave…" (Zukav)

and the gospel of John seems to begin with a riddle…

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it. There came a man who was sent from God; his name was John. He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all men might believe. He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light. 9The true light that gives light to every man was coming into the world. (John 1.1-9)

in a bible i have, this prayer accompanies john 1...

How glorious you are, O Jesus, Word of God. My finite mind can only begin to comprehend your infinite wonders. My words can never aptly reflect who you are as the divine Word. You are before all things. Through you all things are created. By your light all things are seen…

And I believe in one Lord, Jesus Christ

The only-begotten Son of God

Begotten of the Father before all worlds

God of God

Light of Light

Very God of Very God

Begotten, not made

Being of one substance with the Father

By whom all things were made

Who, for us men and for our salvation

Came down from heaven

And was incarnate by the Holy Spirit

of the Virgin Mary

And was made man. (Nicene Creed)

i love that, for the artist, God's artistry is richly woven into the fabric of creation, while for the scientist, God's 'intelligent design' illuminates and informs each new challenge, never giving it all away lest we stop looking for truth.

big bang

what does it mean for something to 'blow your mind?'

to somehow experience something so incredible that you not only struggle for words to describe it, but you just wish you could remain then and there forever?

revelation is a mind-blowing thing…

in the revealing of oneself, there is a deep permission granted which goes beyond anything casual, and a trust that opens oneself to absolute unconditional acceptance and therefore to ultimate rejection. because of the invitation to intimacy, revelation engages the hearts of both parties involved.

could it even be possible for God to experience this overwhelming sense of connection with us- for the mind of God to be blown?

having looked upon us wearing the blood of Christ and the filthy rags of our own righteousness for so long, there is this sense of anticipation in the scriptures that sing of God’s eagerness to see us as we are meant to be.

to see us standing naked before God
not nude before God... naked.
there is a difference.

the fundamental difference between nakedness and nudity is gauged by the degree to which we openly and honestly release ourselves from the whole personal image cultivation thing in favour of self-revelation that fosters intimacy…

this is very much what God waits and waits and waits for with regard to humanity. in the scriptures, the image of a bridegroom is applied to God to illustrate this sense of deep and meaningful anticipatory longing by God for the day of true, mutual self-revelation. likewise, the church is compared to a bride in waiting.

that's right. a bride to be.

i think that in many ways we've gotten it wrong as we've referred to the church as being the bride of Christ. we've applied our western tradition to an eastern analogy.

this past summer while in sri lanka, i learned that the daughter of a dear friend of mine had been married over the course of the year. i was amazed (and mildly disappointed, having not heard until then) that this had all happened so fast, and asked for some more back story. it was explained to me that it wasn't fast at all- that this had been in the works for the last five years and that the husband was in london while she continued to live in her father's home in colombo.

by and by i realized what was going on.

she was betrothed- given, but not yet taken. she was, in the view of everyone, the bride. however, the actual ceremony would be undertaken after a time of preparation- and until then there was all this waiting, hoping, dreaming, planning, preparing.

eventually this beautiful girl will be with her handsome new husband completely, and their minds will both be blown at the depth of connection to which the word 'completely' implies.

but until then, there is all this anticipation and imagination as all is made ready for the final revelation... the one that effectively consummates the new identity and echad that will be part of who they are forever.

is it any wonder that the final book of the bible which describes, among other things, the 'marriage feast of the lamb' is called revelation?

i've always thought that the title pertained to the vision that God gave the writer of the book- a revealing of that which was hidden: the future.

what if the title revelation deals with the fact that, for the first time since the fall of humankind, creator and creation stand before each other completely naked of all that has separated them in order for the sinful and the fallen to not be completely destroyed by the holy? what if it carries within its implication, the openness and vulnerability and the mutual givenness to each other that blows all minds, even the mind of God, simultaneously for all eternity?

(much of the inspiration for this thinking has come from rob bell's book sex God- in particular, the final chapter, aptly titled 'whoopee forever')